Introverts get kind of a bad rap. People picture us as socially inept homeschooled kids with no friends. That’s not true most of the time. We can be a lively bunch, but at the same time, difficult to understand if you don’t quite get us. So if you find yourself loving an introvert, here’s what you should know.
1. We’re more aware of the little things.
We pick up on subtleties. Tones of voice. Body language. Movement. Habits. We see lots of little things that most people don’t. We’re keenly aware of our surroundings and are incredibly perceptive. We catch things about people that most don’t. So if we don’t want to be friends with someone, take the hint. We have a good reason for it.
2. We want to get to know you.
Introverts aren’t terribly good at one night stands. The entire thing feels forced and awkward. We really want to get to know you, the real you, and take our time at it too. We like to know the ins and outs of the people we’re with.
3. We’re no fun at parties, but sometimes we’re the life of them.
If I’ve been more social than normal and then find myself at a party, expect me to be a wallflower. But if I’ve come off a few days of intensive work and I get invited to a party, chances are I’m going to rage. Sometimes we’re a lot of fun at parties, sometimes we’re not. It depends on what’s going on in our lives at the time.
4. After the party, give us some space.
Think of our sociable nature as a battery. Sometimes that battery needs a good recharging, and the perfect recharging is some alone time. From you, from our families, from our friends – from everyone. A little time in nature, on a solo camping trip, having a Netflix staycation; it’s just what the doctor ordered after a big, boisterous party, or just too much socialization.
5. We’re not boring.
Like I said before, there’s this notion that we’re a dull lot. We really aren’t! We can be a lot of fun to be around. But getting comfortable around new people is hard. That’s really our biggest hangup.
6. We’re deep thinkers.
In the same way that we’re more perceptive of what’s going on around us, we tend to think a little bit deeper too. Introverts make great philosophers and educators. In a lot of ways, introverts are the best politicians too. We can give speeches in front of huge groups all day, just don’t expect us to mingle.
7. We like people.
It’s true, we do like people! But we take our sweet time getting to know people. We don’t just make friends willy nilly. It’s important to us to know the friends we’re making very well.
8. Our alone time isn’t intended for escaping from you.
This is the most important one of all: we might disappear for a day or two. We might confine ourselves to our bedrooms or home offices for a while to listen to music or work or do whatever. We may take solo trips or go visit our families alone. This isn’t us escaping you! This is us engaging in exactly what I talked about in #4. Recharging the batteries. We need it from time to time.
Hopefully this sheds a little bit of light on what to expect if you love an introvert.
Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives