8 Things Your Partner Should Never Say, And If They Do, Break Up With Them

This article may contain affiliate links, learn more.

Stark ultimatums or strict rules can sometimes cause a relationship to be limiting or restrictive, even controlling, depending on who's saying what and how often. However, there are some instances where clearly defined rules and boundaries are necessary to protect yourself from someone who means you harm.

This can mean putting boundaries on the things they do but also the things they say, as there are some statements that should never be excused, even by a beloved partner.

Finding the relationship of your dreams, or anything else your heart desires, doesn't have to involve all the grueling work or hours of time invested that you might be dreading. Why not make your dreams come true the easy way?

The Law of Attraction is a practice that will help you quickly, simply, and easily make your greatest wishes come true. Click here to learn more today and see all it can do for you.

The Power Of Words

A couple standing outside, leaning against a railing, the cityscape behind them.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro

So much is said over the course of a relationship. Years and years of conversations, debates, discussions, and arguments all amount to a lot of emotional exchanges. Of course, a healthy and mature couple can handle a fight every so often, but there can sometimes be an imbalance where one-half of the relationship is the one throwing around all the harsh words. This is no longer a healthy relationship; this is just a bad partner.

We often give our significant others a lot of credit, wanting to believe the best in them, but what happens when they continuously say terrible things? If your partner ever says one of these phrases, it's an immediate call to break up with them.

ADVERTISEMENT

1. "You're Overreacting."

ADVERTISEMENT
A couple standing outside on a city street, the woman saying something very directly to the man.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

It's natural to discuss feelings and concerns with your partner. Ideally, these discussions should lead to greater understanding and closeness, but if the response to your vulnerability is "you're overreacting," your partner is displaying a frightening lack of empathy and support.

ADVERTISEMENT

Them being cagey when you bring up worries means they don't respect your feelings at all, or aren't invested enough in you to want to help you through tough times. Your feelings being minimized or painted as "incorrect" now will only lead to them dismissing you more in the future.

ADVERTISEMENT

2. "You Owe Me."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A close shot of a couple sitting side by side, talking to one another, a laptop on the table in front of them.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

The statement "you owe me" can transform an otherwise loving relationship into a scorekeeping dynamic, where gestures of love are commodified rather than given freely. This approach can quickly breed resentment and reduce the relationship to a series of transactions, undermining the genuine affection and support that should be present.

ADVERTISEMENT

If you find that your partner is pulling out this clause whenever you have a disagreement, or you make a compromise, it might be time to consider the underlying attitudes they hold about give and take in your relationship.

ADVERTISEMENT

3. "You Can't Do Anything Right."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple walking outside, the man slightly behind the woman, gesturing as if he's trying to tell her something.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

Receiving constant criticism from your partner can be devastating to your self-esteem. When the critique is pervasive, harsh, and insulting, it can make you feel unappreciated and incompetent. Constructive feedback and discussion are healthy, but when they cross the line into personal attacks, they stop being beneficial and just become hurtful.

ADVERTISEMENT

We tend to let things go in the moment when dealing with someone we love, but you should never have to put up with insults from your partner. Ever.

ADVERTISEMENT

4. "If You Loved Me, You Would..."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple close to one another, the woman laying on her stomach in bed and the man kneeling down to be face to face with her.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

Manipulation in relationships often comes cloaked in the guise of love, which makes it particularly insidious. The phrase "If you loved me, you would..." is a classic example of using emotional blackmail to force someone into compliance.

ADVERTISEMENT

This type of coercion is nothing short of evil, proving that your partner doesn't respect your autonomy or personhood; they merely want you as a tool for their own desires. If you ever hear this kind of statement, it's time to shut the relationship down.

ADVERTISEMENT

5. "I'm the Only One Who Really Understands You."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple standing outside in a windy field, the woman with her hand on the man's chest.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

Isolation is a powerful tool used in unhealthy relationships to increase one-half's dependence on the other person. When a partner claims, "I'm the only one who really understands you," it can create a feeling that they are your sole refuge, thereby cutting off other support from friends and family.

ADVERTISEMENT

This tactic almost always leads to increased control over your life alongside a diminishing sense of confidence and independence. Your partner is trying to make you too scared to ever leave them, meaning they should be dropped as soon as lines like this are spoken.

Want to make your dreams come true in the easiest way possible? Click here to find out how.

ADVERTISEMENT

6. "You're Lucky I Put Up With You."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple sitting next to one another at a table, looking sternly at one another.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

This kind of talk is nothing short of demeaning, and it's a statement that implies your value is contingent upon your partner's patience or tolerance, which is not indicative of a loving, healthy relationship. Hearing these kinds of claims can make you feel unworthy and grateful for minimal affection, which is far less than what you deserve.

ADVERTISEMENT

Your partner should feel lucky to have you around, not insist that you're lucky they stay with you at all. It's a blatant display of disrespect that you should never put up with.

ADVERTISEMENT

7. "Life Would Be Worse Without Me."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple sitting side by side on the couch, angled away from each other, the woman with her head in her hand, looking sad.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

Threats of abandonment or suggesting that your life would be worse without your partner can create a pervasive sense of insecurity and fear, making you afraid to ever leave them, even when they mistreat you. This tactic is designed to keep you in the relationship by preying on your fears of loneliness or failure.

ADVERTISEMENT

A supportive, healthy partner should provide security and comfort, not threaten withdrawal as a form of control. Your life would actually be better without this person trying to convince you otherwise.

ADVERTISEMENT

8. "You're Being Selfish" In Relation To Personal Goals

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple sitting outside having a tense conversation.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

Supporting each other's personal ambitions is an important part of any relationship. You want them to have their own goals and dreams, just as you have yours. However, if your partner accuses you of being selfish for pursuing those goals, you might feel guilty and abandon the things you're passionate about to placate them.

ADVERTISEMENT

This kind of talk severely undermines your individuality and discourages you from pursuing personal success, success that they fear will cause you to leave them. Leave them anyway, as they clearly don't care about your interests, desires, and dreams for the future.

ADVERTISEMENT

The Worst Of The Bunch

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A couple standing outside, the woman looking at the man with a shocked expression, as if he'd just said something she disliked.
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

There are a lot of terrible people out there, ones who use statements like these to lock down their relationships. They're so insecure, so sure that any partner will leave them, that they have to turn to threats and manipulation to ensure people stick around.

ADVERTISEMENT

Their insecurity is no reason to mistreat you or anyone else. If they can't manage themselves maturely in a relationship, then they shouldn't be in one at all, though they'll continue to feel entitled to one. As soon as a partner says any of the statements above, you need to break up immediately. Make it clear that these tactics will never work on you.

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
A purple textured background with a large, semi-transparent graphic of Higher Perspective's mandala logo rising from the lower right corner. There's white text that reads,
Canva Pro
Canva Pro
ADVERTISEMENT

To sign up for the Higher Perspectives weekly newsletter and get more articles delivered right to your inbox, click here.