This Is The REAL Reason Why We Attract Toxic Partners And Emotionally Unavailable People
Oxytocin loves love.
Oxytocin, like dopamine, is a hormone that makes us feel pretty great. Oxytocin, often called the love hormone, indiscriminately releases when something nice happens, like when you're lovingly embraced or told that you're loved. Oxytocin doesn't care if your partner is abusive. If they are physically good to you at any point, oxytocin comes around to say, "This is awesome! I want to bond with this person."
Oxytocin doesn't just support bonding, but it also promotes trust. So when an abusive partner does things that causes your brain to release oxytocin, they're making it harder for you to see the real them.
So in a sense, it's not all in your head, but it is all in your brain. There are biological reasons we find ourselves okay being with not so great partners. The trick now is to realize that your brain has, in a sense, conned you, and that you have some tough choices to make.