Relationships

5 Habits That Make People Bitter

Life isn't always carefree and fun. It can be stressful and tough, it can even begin to feel so draining and difficult that a person just can't handle the weight of it all on their shoulders.

Things go wrong, people disappoint us, and bad things happen. Sometimes it's as though everything that can go wrong is doing so all at once.

When you feel like you've been put through the wringer and you're all out of patience, it's incredibly important not to give into the temptation to turn bitter and angry.

Hard as it may be, you've got to try and focus on the lighter side of things, and don't let go of your optimism.

Bitterness is an ugly thing, and it only ends up hurting us and the people we love in the end. It benefits no one and adds even more unpleasantness to a world already burdened with plenty of negativity and challenges.

Below are 5 major habits of the bitter and jaded, and tips for avoiding falling in to the cycle yourself.

1. Clinging to grudges.

Carrying personal injuries with you in life gets heavy. It casts a shadow of negativity over all of your thoughts and feelings, and can directly impede your ability to progress or improve.

When you refuse to let go of a grudge, you aren't getting any kind of revenge on the person you're angry with, you're only hurting yourself.

It's perfectly fine not to forget something that's happened, this is how we learn lessons and form our worldview, but letting go of the toxic anger you feel is critical to your self-growth.

2. Using drama to garner attention or sympathy.

Bitter people aren't very enjoyable to be around, but even they get lonely.

Because they're incapable of making friends in a positive way like through friendly conversation, they tend to try and stir up dramatic situations and problems to connect with people over.

Obviously this is an unhealthy form of companionship and can only last so long as the problem can be complained about, so it's always temporary.

It can be tempting to try and gain friends this way because it seems initially easy, but if you find that the discussions you have with someone always center around complaints, annoyances or talking negatively about other people, you need to change your tune.

"Friends" of this type only amplify the bad energy around you.

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3. Constant jealousy and envy.

There's a good reason why we refer to this as a green-eyed monster. It is one of the most destructive and ugly emotions we're capable of.

One of the first signs of true bitterness is an inability to be happy for others when good things happen to them.

If all you can think of when you hear someone else's good news is how much more deserving you are, you need a reality check.

You have no right to assume anything about other people, you don't know the intricate details of their lives and they are no less deserving of happiness in life than you are.

Angrily stewing over what someone else has doesn't help you achieve your own goals or desires.

You need to stop comparing yourself against others entirely. Focus on your own life and your own goals, this is how you make good things happen for yourself.

4. Always expecting the absolute worst.

It can be a real battle sometimes to stay positive even when it seems like you just can't get a break, but it is essential in order to keep yourself from giving into cynicism.

This can turn into a cycle of self-fulfilling prophecy.

You try your best and still lose out a few times, so you stop believing that the outcome will ever be anything other than bad.

Unfortunately this mindset ultimately sets you up for just the failure you wish to avoid.

You have to keep that little bit of hope in your mind and heart, that even if things have been bad for a while, there is always a chance they will be better this time around.

The truth is that every day is a new day and another chance to turn it all around. Don't forget it.

5. Focusing only on the negatives.

Some things in life are simply not under our control, this is something we must all accept.

What is always under our control however, is how we react to these things and what we choose to take away from it.

The human brain is built for survival, so we do indeed have a tendency to be more vigilant of the negative or worrisome things than the positive.

This is why it is so paramount that we make positivity a priority. We need to be willing to put in the energy and work it takes to take stock of the good things in life.

Of course apathy and pessimism are easy, but they're also poisonous and crippling.

If you just take a moment to think about the positive things you've seen, heard or experienced recently, no matter how big or seemingly insignificant, you'll find there is always more to be grateful for than you realized.

Positive thoughts and framing of your feelings will breed more positivity and joy in your life, which will create a more productive and fulfilled existence organically; The kind of existence you desire and truly deserve.

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