New Research Says Your Cat Is Probably Trying To Kill You

New research conducted at the University of Edinburgh in conjunction with the Bronx Zoo has uncovered that domestic cats, your cuddly puss puss, is an asshole who's probably trying to kill you.

Their work found that your domesticated kitty cat is much more closely related to lions and leopards than originally thought. Their three dominant personality traits were impulsiveness, dominance, and neuroticism.

"They're cute and furry and cuddly, but we need to remember when we have cats as pets, we are inviting little predators into our house," explained 9News psychologist Dr Max Wachtel.

Of course, every cat has a different personality, and they live with us because both of us decided that it worked. They ate the mice and we took care of them. Perfect.

Or is it?

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