13 Signs That You’re Being Put On The Back Burner

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One of the hardest lessons we ever have to learn in life is that people aren’t always as genuine as they make themselves out to be, and that you’re not as big of a priority to them as you would like to think you are.

Have you ever found yourself constantly giving and giving, only for your good deeds and actions to go unreciprocated?

Having people like this in our lives is draining and unhealthy.

We all need to create relationships with people who are going to make us a priority as often as we make them a priority. Otherwise, it’s time to tell them to get lost.

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Here are 13 signs that you’re being put on the back burner by someone who doesn’t see you as a priority:

1. You constantly catch them lying about seemingly insignificant things.

A greyscale image of a woman holding a finger to her lips.
Unsplash / Kristina Flour
Unsplash / Kristina Flour

2. They always invite other people to big events and gatherings

You know you’re an option and not really a priority when they don’t want to take you out in public to bigger events like parties, weddings, or birthdays.

You’re a side thing, not the real deal.

3. They never remember anything you say when you talk about what’s happening in your life.

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4. Most plans are spur of the moment.

Your phone buzzes. It’s 11pm on a Friday night. You’re about to turn in after a quiet evening at home with a book. “Want 2 hang out?”

This is code for something, and you know exactly what it is. “I couldn’t find anyone else so now I’m talking to you, Ms. Last Resort.” Pass.

5. You find yourself making excuses for their poor behavior

6. They frequently bail on you.

Their plans are spur of the moment, and while they might agree to do something you want to at a future date, they often bail on you.

This probably means that they found someone or something better to occupy their time.

7. You feel unhappy in the relationship more often than not

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8. It takes hours or days to reply to a text.

If you were a priority to this person, yeah, maybe sometimes they wouldn’t get back to you right away, but generally, you should be getting a reply back pretty quick.

If they get back to you when it’s convenient, chances are, you’re a convenience.

9. You avoid making plans with others because you’re waiting to hear back from them.

10. You put in all the effort.

Let me guess: you make all the plans. You put in all the effort. They seem reluctant. If that’s the case, you’re definitely not a priority.

11. All of your interaction happens behind closed doors: there are never date nights or outings.

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12. They say you’re too needy.

And this is the biggest crock of them all. When you reach out, or when you stand up for yourself, they put you down as too needy.

Here’s an idea: forget them. Delete their number. Don’t respond to texts. Move on.

13. You feel like they’re bored when they’re around you.

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Higher Perspectives Author

Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives