What Happens In A Man’s Brain When He Falls In Love, According To Science
Love is one of the most beautiful and powerful feelings. It can be scary to let it in and be vulnerable enough to let another person have such an impact on us. Once a man is able to finally let himself fall in love, it can become a source of extreme joy that makes him want to make the woman he’s fallen for feel like the queen of the world. But what exactly happens in his brain that encourages this shift? It all comes down to chemicals and hormones.
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They Feel “High” Like A Drug
The beginning of the relationship can be its most exciting as all the chemicals released into the brain feel new and addicting. It’s like the first taste of a drug. It always releases the biggest high the first time. The same way at the beginning of a relationship, the brain produces a very high level of natural amphetamine that makes a man feel like he’s high on love.
The rush of this feeling increases their energy and puts an extra sprint in their step. It’s why men are often most attentive and affectionate in the beginning stages. Just like with substance addiction, once the brain has a taste, it starts to crave more and looks for the source (the woman they’re falling for) to get more of that “reward” feeling. The more they interact with the woman they love, the more the “reward” feeling in the center of the brain is activated.
Good Judgement Goes Out The Window
The reason why we seem to purposely turn a blind eye to red flags even when they scream in our face when we’re falling in love, is because love can actually distort our judgment. A man sees the woman he loves as perfect in every way and every flaw is just an exciting challenge that he feels he can overcome. His bias can be blamed on his survival instincts. Basically, as humans, we’re wired to mate. It’s an evolutionary thing.
A man may feel the need to stick with his “perfect” woman long-term to have a baby. Even if that’s not actually the case, it’s where the impulse once started. It causes him to overlook sources of concern and clouds his judgment in the beginning.
Forming Good Memories
When a man is falling in love, his brain floods with the love hormone. The more he spends time with this woman, the more he activates the oxytocin neurotransmitter, also known as the cuddle hormone. He then associates the woman who helped him release this hormone with good memories and feelings.
Even if there are some hiccups or awkward moments, the brain tends to only remember the positive ones in the forefront. It may even help the man release emotional baggage from past relationships. The closer he becomes to his new woman, the deeper he forms an attachment to her.
Overall Overwhelming Happiness
Men in love can actually be happier. It’s not because a woman has become their only source of happiness but because when he falls in love, he also releases a high level of dopamine, the happiness chemical. This chemical has the power to make a person feel like they’re in a state of euphoria. It can even increase their pain tolerance. The more dopamine a person releases, the easier it is to access a positive mentality and be hopeful.
Dopamine is also responsible for the physical effects of being in love such as the butterflies he feels in his stomach, his racing heart and sweaty palms. These are just a reflection of his attraction to the woman around him.
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Men May Fall In Love Faster Than Women
Contrary to popular belief, men actually tend to fall in love faster than women. A lot of that has to do with typical gender roles. Men are taught to make the first move and be invested enough to chase and court the woman they desire while women are taught to play hard to get and be coy in the beginning as to allow men the pleasure of the chase. Women feel like they have to be “earned” while men feel like they have to fulfill a certain expectation.
This makes men jump in first to set the relationship into motion and display their “manliness.” While society has been slowly moving away from these gender roles, the effects are still in place. Women take more tie to fall in love as they take longer to decide if a man will be a good fit while men continue to try to make the first move.
But They Feel Less Pain In Love Than Women
It turns out that love is powerful that it can have a direct effect n pain receptors and actually physically reduce pain. According to a neuroscientist at the University of Alabama: “Love is so powerful that in laboratory tests, it reduces pain by half,” says Dr. Jarred Younger, Ph.D. “It does so by sending messages down to the spinal cord to block the pain messages before they reach the brain.”
Luckily for men, the effect is even stronger than women which they may need if they’re the ones falling in love first in case it isn’t reciprocated.
It All Changes Overtime
What’s important to keep in mind is that just like any high, the effects eventually wear off and start to take on a new form. It’s not that a man eventually falls out of love, it’s that the feeling changes and becomes more of a bonded attachment. The feelings in the beginning are just the foundation. In fact, they might even predict the outcome of the relationship.
Researchers found that “brain scans at the beginning of the relationship can predict who will still be in a strong relationship 40 months later, as “over time, the brain chemistry in men may change as the relationship shifts from intensely passionate to more familiar, comfortable, and intimate.”
It’s Possible To Stay In Love Forever
That’s not to say that some people do not stay passionately in love for years on end if they’re able to activate the reward areas of the brain over and over again This can be done by creating positive experiences and going on adventures together. In any relationship, always look at how you feel and ask yourself: does this person make you love yourself more? Do you want to grow old with them?
Love is more than just kisses and butterflies, it’s much more than that. If you want to know more on what your birth chart reveals about how you love and what you need out of a partner, check out this personalized report based on date of birth.
Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives