There are few feelings worse than the feeling you experience when you’re told that you’ve been cheated on. In a relationship, it can be the darkest of moments.
For many, it ends the relationship in what could very well be the worst way possible. But there are things you learn when you’ve been cheated on that you carry for the rest of your life.
For better or for worse, the lessons you learn are important.
1. Jealousy is a dangerous force.
Jealousy is among the most maddening of emotions you can experience. Jealousy is the ultimate destroyer of trust.
If you’ve opted to stay with someone who has cheated on you, the only way to truly proceed is to break yourself of that jealousy, to start over, and to form a new bond.
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2. Love isn’t always forever.
Many times, cheating leads to breakups. It shatters your love for a person. It takes time, sometimes years of your life, to fall out of love with someone, cheating or no.
But I can tell you from experience, once you are no longer in love with them and once you understand that love isn’t forever, you truly feel like you soar.
You look back at that person and wondered what you saw in the first place.
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3. People have the capacity to be so shitty.
This one largely speaks for itself.
4. Love isn’t always enough.
People cheat for a variety of reasons. According to one study, women cheat most often because they need to feel desirable or are more attractive and they’re attracted to someone else.
Men most often cheat because they want more intimacy and more variety. What’s most interesting is that 34% of women and 56% of men who cheat say they’re happy with their partner, that they’re still in love with them.
And that brings us to the hardest lesson of all: love isn’t always enough. It sometimes doesn’t matter how much you love someone. It doesn’t matter how much they love you. Love doesn’t prevent cheating.
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5. You’re a strong person.
Once you’ve come out the ass end of being cheated on, you realize how strong you really are. You realize how resilient you are.
You realize that sleeping on your friend’s floor for 2 weeks while you looked for a new place, that all those lonely nights, all those stupid dates, learning how to be alone again – that all of it really taught you just how strong you are.
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Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives