Relationships
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How Narcissists Play The Victim To Turn The Tables On You

The most dangerous part of having a narcissist in your life is that you usually don't realize it until it's too late. Narcissists are really skilled at coming off charming and manipulating you into falling for their act. It's only once you fall in their grasp that they start to show you their true colors.

Be careful as a narcissist will attempt to turn the tables on you every time that you confront them. They will do anything to not take accountability even if it means tearing you down in the process. But, it doesn't mean that you have to let them. Here's how to pick up on their own game.

Being In Complete Denial

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Deny, deny, deny. That is a narcissists' favorite philosophy whenever you attempt to confront them. It's not always clear whether they're simply lacking the self-awareness to realize how hurtful their actions are or if they refuse to take accountability.

It can be quite confusing to be on the receiving end of someone who claims to care about you, but then doesn't care for your needs when you express them.

Using Fear To Control You

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​Remember how you thought it was really sweet at first that they were being completely open and vulnerable with you? Often this encourages their victims to do the same, revealing their worst fears and struggles.

When a narcissist feels like they are being called out, they'll do anything to gain back control. Fear is a powerful weapon that they know will make you retract. Don't cave into their threats. If they're telling you they'll leave you and no one else will ever love you, prove them wrong!

Lying Their Head Off

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This manipulation tactic throws so many statements at you that you can't even keep up anymore. Either they're attempting to delude themselves or lose you in their web of lies, or they're trying to convince both you and themselves of an alternate reality.

This makes you question your own version of events and by the end, you don't even understand what's going on anymore.

Projecting Their Failures

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Narcissists tend to assume that everyone is just as toxic as they are,. They convince themselves that what they're doing is "obvious" so it's clearly your own fault if you are affected by it.

What they're doing is projecting their own failures onto their victims. This includes their own insecurities. So if for example, they're cheating, they'll accuse their victim of doing it too.

Shifting The Blame

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Somehow everything is your fault even if you are completely removed from it. If they had a bad day at work and took it out on you, it's somehow your fault for not being supportive enough.

They'll make up completely unreasonable explanations for your supposed involvement simply because they refuse to take control of their own actions. Change is not on their list of priorities.

Play The Victim Themselves

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In their logic, narcissists assume that if they claim the victim role first then you can't have it. Clearly, it doesn't exactly work that way. They want to get rid of all responsibility by making you have to be the one to apologize.

It's just a distraction tactic to shift the attention from their wrongful actions to the way that they claim you hurt them, as if being called out makes you even.

Rely On Your Pity

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If you wonder why victims stay so long with narcissists it often has to do with guilt. Narcissists are great at telling sob stories, and making you feel like their lifeline.

They often use their bad experiences as a way to justify their actions, so they no longer seem like the bad guy but rather someone who needs your help to do better. Remember that it's not your responsibility.

Framing Their Stories

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It's all about perspective right? Narcissists have a way of framing the story from such angle that your reaction to it seems unwarranted. They'll tell you that you're overreacting because it was just a joke or that you're too sensitive as no one else would be upset over their actions.

Be careful because eventually the repetition of the same frame makes you start to see things from their perspective over yours. This is when you become completely blind to the red flags and start justifying them.

Pulling Away

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Pulling away is their way of giving you a taste of life once they're gone. It's like punishing you so you learn to "appreciate" them better once they give you attention back. They're instilling a reward system in you so that you think that you have to live to please them, or you'll suffer the consequences.

Except you don't. If they can't communicate or be there when you need them, then ignore them back. You're better off without them.

Showering You With Affection

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A narcissist goes from zero a hundred real quick. One day they're mad at you and won't give you the time of the day and the next they're making you feel like the luckiest person in the world. They do this for two main reasons. First, it's a way to condition your behaviour, so that you're always trying to earn their affection.

Second, it's a way to pull you back in, that they resort you as soon as they feel like they might be stating to lose you. Don't fall for it again.

Spreading Their Gossip

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Another tactic that narcissists use to try to impose their version of reality is by spreading it to other people. it's a way to gain power in numbers. Plus it gives them an alibi that they can throw back in your face.

These kind of tactics are what end up making you feel crazy and alone. You end up wondering if you're in the wrong for being the only one to see them for who they are are.

Talking To Your Loved Ones

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Narcissists love to feed their ego by having everyone on their side. They have no problem going to your loved ones behind your back, claiming to need advice, only to paint you as the bad guy. They want empathy at any price.

This is also a way to isolate you and make you lose your support system so that you feel like you have no one left to go to expect your narcissist.

Hogging The Conversation

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Having a conversation with a narcissist isn't exactly a two-way street. They love to hear themselves talk. This is a way for them to shift the power dynamic so that they have complete control over the conversation. If you can't even get a word in, then you won't have a chance at defending yourself and they'll assume they "won" the argument.

Or, you might just feel so drained after listening to them, that you won't express yourself for the sake of ending the conversation.

Raising Their Voice

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Similarly to hogging the conversation, yelling and raising their voice is their intimidation tactic. Often victims will be so focused on the tone and volume being used against them that they'll feel powerless to it.

What they're yelling about isn't as much of the focus as the actual yelling. It's just to make you feel small so that you don't even bother responding to it.

Critiquing Your Every Move

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In an effort to completely break you down, a narcissist will critique everything from your accomplishments to the way you dress. They want to take away every ounce of your self-esteem to ensure that you don't stand up to yourself, that you simply say yes to them, and more importantly so that you feel too weak to ever be alone without them.

What they don't realize is self esteem can be built back up.

The Silent Treatment

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Being ignored and made invisible may be one of the worst feelings in the world. By giving you the silent treatment, you start to feel like you don't matter so much that your only focus becomes fighting back to be noticed.

When a narcissist feels at a loss for words, they'll start to ignore you. Although you may think you're winning at first, after long enough, victims will feel like they're willing to do anything to end the silent treatment.

Spirituality

The Biggest Deathbeds Regrets Shared By The Dying

It's hard to pinpoint our exact regrets as we go through life because they're constantly changing. We regret decisions in the moment but we move on and eventually, they don't seem like a big deal. But, over time, some regrets accumulate and mold into one big regret. Unfortunately, by the time we realize what it is that we value most and wish we had done differently, it's a little too late. The good news is, if you're reading this, you're likely alive and well. That means that you still have an opportunity to do something about your regrets so by the time that you're on your deathbed, you have none.

Pay attention to these biggest deathbed regerts, shared by people in their final days. They were recorded by Shannon L. Alder an author and therapist, known for her tidbits of wisdom that have been published in over 100 different books.

Click HERE to learn what Numerology says about your life using only your Birth Date.

Living True To The Self

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"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life other people expected of me."

From a very young age, we become conditioned to live to please and look good in the eyes of others. We prioritize the value of how others see us, over the way we see ourselves. We work tirelessly to make relationships work, to get promotions at work, to be seen, appreciated, and valued by strangers. We have created social networks that carry the sole purpose of seeing, and being seen. However, we end up setting unrealistic expectations and working towards unachievable standards.

We never feel good enough or stop to appreciate who we are and how far we've come. We never truly feel fulfilled or take the risks necessary to reach our highest selves, without worrying about how it affects everyone else, or what everyone will think of it. Sadly, at the end of the day, only we are responsible for our own happiness and achievements so what others think really doesn't matter.

Taking The Time To Watch Children Grow

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"I wish I took time to be with my children more when they were growing up."

Circumstantially, many parents struggle to juggle their responsibilities on top of their role to their children. They convince themselves that by working overtime, even missing their children's events is ultimately for their own good. But really no amount of extra money earned will ever measure up to the priceless moments we could have spent with our children.

In the blink of an eye, they go from children to adults and stop needing us. They get used to our absence. They never learn the value of family time because we didn't take the time to instill it in them. As parents, everything we do while our children grow up has the power to impact the people they become.

Revealing Feelings Without Fear

man with stickers all over his face with words like "norms' "society'" doubt"

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"I wish I had the courage to express my feelings, without the fear of being rejected or unpopular."

The fear of rejection truly holds up back from going after our heart's desires. We get caught up in all the worst-case scenarios that we fail to take the risk and possibility live the best-case scenarios. But, isn't better to take a risk and at least find out how it plays out, then always wonder about what could have happened?

The person you ask out could reject you or could be the love of your life. The promotion you ask for could be dismissed or could be your next big break. The book you've always wanted to write could be laughed at or could be the next bestseller...You'll never know until you try.

Take a quick zodiac reading here to find out what your universe has to say about you right now.

Staying Connected With Loved Ones

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"I wish I would have stayed in touch with friends and family."

People come in and out of your life for a reason but some people are meant to stay alongside you for most of the journey if enough effort is put in to maintain and nurture those bonds. It's easy for us to get so caught up in our lives that we stop taking the time to reach out. Yet relationships are just like muscles, they need to be worked out, cared for, and nurtured.

Even the strongest bonds need to be valued. Telling someone you love that you're thinking of them can go a long way. It's an equal give and take. H uman beings are wired to crave connections with another.

Surrendered To Forgivness

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"I wish I would have forgiven someone when I had the chance."

Holding grudges is exhausting. It keeps us trapped in a cycle of resentment and frustration. It often leads us to blame and holds us back from growth. With forgiveness, on the other hand, there is freedom. We finally let go of what no longer serves us and open ourselves up to moving forward.

Forgiveness is not only for the person being forgiven but for the person offering forgiveness. It releases both parties and frees up space within them to receive new and positive beginnings. Everyone makes mistakes, we're only human, and anyone that says otherwise isn't looking at the big picture.

Expressed To People How Valuable They Are

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"I wish I would have told the people I loved the most how important they are to me."

It's incredible how much of an impact we have the power to make on one another. Think of the butterfly effect, where every little action, as small as a butterfly flapping its wings, can have enough of a reaction that could trigger a tsunami across the world.

Little gestures, as small as smiling at a stranger, holding the door open, or even just saying thank you can make or break someone's day. These gestures have even more of an impact when shared between loved ones. Let the people know around you know how much you value them, how special they are, and how big of a role they play in this world while you still can.

Tapped Into Confidence Instead Of Fear

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"I wish I would have had more confidence and tried more things, instead of being afraid of looking like a fool."

Life is all about risk. If you think about it, we're constantly living in the unknown. We have no idea what tomorrow brings We barely have control over what the next moment looks like. So much of what creates our experience is dependent on circumstances and other people.

So, at the very least, why don't we take as much control as we can over the parts that are up to us? We make all kinds of excuses for why we can't make that move, get out of a relationship or try a new career instead of actually finding out what our lives could look like. We are ultimately the sole creator of our story, so the least we could do is put more effort and take risks to write our narrative.

Understand your purpose and your potential so that you can take control of your emotions, your life, and your future by clicking HERE.

Leaving A Mark On The World

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"I wish I would have done more to make an impact in this world."

You would be surprised at how easy it is to make an impact in this world. All it takes is making an impact on one single person, who in turn will do it for another and before you know we all touch each other's lives, one way or another. To make a difference, you don't have to single-handedly change the world. But, you can start small. Help where you can, don't put it off because you're too tired or it's not the right time. When you see an opportunity take it, instead of leaving it for the next person.

Don't get caught up in an unmeaningful life. Every day is a new chance to make a difference, somewhere, somehow.

Pursuing Talents And Passions

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"I wish I would have pursued my talents and gifts."

The good news is no matter how much regret you may feel near the end of your life, at the very last moment, none of it will matter anymore:

"As a hospice worker, I’ve had the honor of being with many a soul as they’ve left their bodies. At the moment of death, with those who have any power of communication, regret seems a distant 'human' concept that really no longer applies. I recall a gentleman who woke just briefly enough from days-long unconsciousness to say his own earthly name with the most beautiful mix of love, compassion, and bemusement. He spoke it as one might speak to a newborn baby or beloved pet, with zero judgment, and certainly no regret, at just the moment he passed​" - Wendora15 / Reddit​

Taken Risks Instead Of Remaining Comfortable

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"I wish I would have experienced more, instead of settling for a boring life filled with routine, mediocrity, and apathy."

Let this be your reminder to live every day fully while you can, to write off any regrets, and to take risks and watch them pay off. But, at the end of the day, appreciate what you have done, how far you've come, and the incredible person that you are,

"In my experience though, despite their regrets, many of the dying seem to get a look in their eyes right at the very end, when I think they are finally realizing the futility of struggle and surrendering to what Is. Knowing there is nothing left to do. For a moment you know they have transcended the mind and are free." - receding / Reddit

Are You Living While You're Alive?

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Are you still searching for a life without regret? Tap into the 4,000-year-old science Numerology to find out what it can reveal about your life path.

That's right, the numerology of your birth date, can help you discover detailed information about who you truly are and what is hiding in your subconscious. You won't believe how accurate it is

Unlock the messages hidden in your Personality Code now with your free personalized video report!