How To Reset Your Relationship And Start Fresh With Your Partner
Feelings of tension or strife in a relationship are never easy to deal with. So much so that some people avoid addressing them altogether, afraid of what will happen if they dare confront the other person.
It can't wait forever though, and the longer it's put off, the harder it will be to solve these now deep-rooted issues. When it reaches that point, sometimes more radical and drastic measures are needed...something like a relationship reset.
In any relationship, always take stock of your feelings and ask yourself: does this person make you love yourself more? Do you want to grow old with them?
Love is more than just kisses and butterflies, it's much more than that. If you want to know more on what your birth chart reveals about how you love and what you need out of a partner, check out this personalized report based on date of birth.
Couple Struggles
Sometimes relationships experience difficulties that may be hard to navigate or understand. Taking a step back to reevaluate the relationship as a whole can be a beneficial process of getting to the heart of what's going on and addressing it.
It may feel difficult to put your own relationship under fire like this, but approaching the discussion with kindness, understanding, and empathy can help both parties find common ground. The process may be difficult, but taking the time to pause and assess can be a great way to offer insight, gain clarity, or discuss expectations in an effort to strengthen the relationship.
Taking A Step Back
You might find that the best way to overcome or try to find a solution for the problems you and your partner are facing is to take a 'relationship reset.'
To reset a relationship is to basically start from square one again. You both bring yourselves back to the mindset you held at the beginning of the relationship and try to rebuild the foundation that had previously begun to crumble.
This can be an especially helpful plan of action for sensitive souls or empaths, as it allows them to detach themselves from the heavy emotions once plaguing the relationship and start fresh again with an open mind.
But how exactly do you reset a relationship? What's the first step?
Making The Decision To Do It
The first step is making the firm, joint decision to engage in a relationship reset. Why might a couple want to do this, though?
There's no doubt that you still like this person, and they still like you, seeing as you're both willing and wanting to work out whatever friction exists between the two of you. Perhaps you've become too intertwined in each others' lives and you need to remember who you are without them, or maybe interacting at a distance for a while will bring you back into the relationship with new eyes when you're ready.
The important part here is to make sure your motivation isn't coming from a place of latent bitterness or from wanting time fully away from your partner. A relationship reset is not the same as taking a break.
Spend Less Time Around Them
Now, for how to actually practice this reset.
The overall theme here will be spending less time around your partner. You're not cutting yourself off completely or isolating yourself, but rather creating a healthy distance between the two of you. Think back to when you were first dating before getting together—you're returning to that stage of communication.
You don't have to reply to all of their communications immediately, you don't have to spend every night together, and you should prioritize time alone or with friends you see less often.
Avoid Ghosting
Alongside that previous step, it's important that you avoid ghosting your partner entirely. Hopefully you both communicated your desire to keep each other at arm's length for a while, so the distance shouldn't come as an unwelcome surprise to them, but this doesn't mean you should be constantly ignoring them. If you're still in a committed relationship, some level of communication is expected, and you can't just leave them hanging for your own independence's sake.
If you want that type of experience, or if the idea of still monitoring your partner's messages at all is stressful, taking a full break might be better for both of you.
Spend Less Time Thinking About Them
Along with spending less time physically in their energy, learn to spend less time thinking about your partner. Of course, thinking about the one we love makes us happy, but for those with overactive brains or emotionally driven souls, our partner's possible feelings and reactions to things can become to sole basis we use to make decisions.
Relearn how to consider your own thoughts, your own feelings, and your own desires when going about your life. You're allowed to have these things separate from anyone else, even your other half. Reminding yourself of that is a great way to re-enter your relationship with a heightened level of personal security and confidence.
Remind Yourself You're Not Responsible For Them
Wanting to support our loved ones, partner or otherwise, is a natural instinct within all of us. We want to see them happy and thriving, free from struggle or strife, and sometimes that wish really gets the better of us. We start to overexert ourselves to prevent any hardship or sadness from befalling them, even though that's a fruitless task.
We can never prevent every instance of misfortune from crossing someone's path. Also, even if we could, that's not our job. We are not responsible for the happenings and feelings of others, how they react to things is completely within their own framework.
Practice Simply Observing
When the people we love are going through strife or struggling in any way, we tend to feel their pain alongside them, empathizing with them because we hate to see them feeling bad. This isn't wrong in any way, but it can sometimes lead to behavior like the last point where we over-insert ourselves into their problems and cause more conflicting emotions.
To quell this, try to shift into logical thinking over emotional thinking. Approach these situations with your head before your heart. You don't have to become extremely emotionally invested in every issue other people are having.
Focus On Your Own Health
This one might seem obvious, but use this reset time as a period to focus solely on yourself. Engage in old hobbies you love but dropped, go out by yourself, relish in what you love, and enjoy your own company. The partial reason for this reset is to let yourself reconnect with your core being as separate from your partner, and the only way you can do that is to take pleasure in life's joys!
It's also a time to really examine the thought patterns you exercise about your partner, learning how your brain works when it comes to them and severing what is no longer healthy or helpful.
Spend Time With Others
This reset doesn't have to be spent entirely in solitude either, though. If you find that your relationship has come in between your friendships or time spent with family, be it on purpose or by accident, now is the perfect time to reconnect with them.
If your partner truly loves and supports you, they'll want you to have these other people you can rely on when things get tough or should you need an outside perspective. Fostering those connections will better ensure that you can keep them in the long run.
After The Experiment
It's important to remember that this reset still may not work the way you hope it does. There's a chance it will give both parties a fresh outlook on the relationship and a better understanding of the issues, but there's an equal chance it won't.
This is a process you only turn to if you're really needing answers, but sometimes that answer is to break things off for good. That doesn't mean you failed or that anyone is in the wrong, just that you two weren't right for each other in the long run, and that's okay.
You still tried, and that's commendable on its own. You now have the knowledge that there are better things out there for you, and you have the permission to go chase them.
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