From a very young age, children can spot themes centering romantic relationships in their lives. Children's shows and books contain even loose ideas about romance, and kids will observe their parents or other adult figures in their lives and see that they're in relationships, too. Young minds start to wonder what's up with this concept and what it means for their own futures.
Of course, it's not something they'll really have to worry about for some time, but the idea is still planted early, meaning we're raised with the concept of dating swirling in our heads. What does this do to our psyche, and what are some of the beliefs we adopt because of it?
You don't have to keep living that same cycle, though. You can find yourself a secure, loving partner if you follow the psychological techniques laid out in this video. Take control of your love life today and draw your perfect partner right to you!
With Or Without
The way we go about relationships is a unique journey for everyone. While this means that everyone's relationships can look different, it also means that some people simply prefer being without one.
This can be hard for some people to understand, those who couldn't imagine being without their partner or not being in a relationship for an extended period of time, and as such, these types of people sometimes have some strange beliefs about those who do prefer to stay single. Below are five myths about single people that simply aren't true, so you can better understand the solo folk in your life.
1. Single People Are Too Picky
Being single isn't about being overly selective or excessively choosy. Rather, it's about setting healthy boundaries and valuing one's own worth. Consciously, single people have learned the invaluable lesson that their time and energy are precious commodities not to be squandered on toxic relationships.
For them, the single life isn't a compromise but an active choice for peace, joy, and self-fulfillment. They understand that finding the right partner is a matter of quality over quantity.
Their Own Growth
Their focus isn't on some made-up ticking clock or a fear of missing out. Instead, they invest their energy in personal growth, pursuing dreams, and building a fulfilling life beyond the constraints of a relationship.
Choosing a life partner shouldn't be about fulfilling norms or appeasing others. It's about finding genuine love and mutual respect in another person. Encouraging someone to lower their standards merely to fit societal expectations is not a solution. We should celebrate their independence and encourage everyone to embrace their individual journey, ensuring that future generations learn the importance of self-worth alongside the importance put on dating.
2. Single People Are Destined To Be Forever Alone
People tend to believe that people who are single for a long time are desperately lonely or that they're simply meant to be alone forever, a recluse in their own homes. This isn't true, of course. Studies have actually proven that single people have stronger social networks overall than people in relationships.
Not only that, but they're more likely to value the important work that they do and experience more emotional growth. Being single isn't some sort of death sentence, everyone is single at some point! There's so much more to life than just dating.
One's single status doesn't equate to loneliness. If anything, choosing to remain single is a sign that someone is on a personal journey. We never know someone's reasoning for being single. Maybe they just left an abusive relationship and want to take the time to heal. Their choice should be respected and celebrated, as should anyone's regarding their relationship status.
Those who choose to stay single can pick up the dating mantle whenever they wish. It's not social suicide to be without a partner for a few years.
3. Single People Are Single Because They're Undesirable
Society often scrutinizes single women, questioning their desirability through relationship status. If a woman is in a relationship, she must be desirable, either because she's beautiful or because she offers up enough qualities that (mostly men) find important. Meanwhile, single women must be single because they're undesirable, again either physically unattractive or not the right personality that (mostly men) would enjoy.
Of course, this is nonsense, and research agrees. Desirable traits, including intelligence and success, can make individuals targets for manipulation and abuse. Smart and successful women face romantic discrimination due to insecurity and misogyny in the dating world.
A woman could be extremely desirable in many areas yet still be single because men find her 'intimidating.' They'll think this due to deeply rooted issues (like toxic masculinity, for example) making them believe they ought to be the more successful one in the relationship.
So, no, being single doesn't inherently mean someone is undesirable. What it means is they haven't found the right person who will love all of their amazing traits without getting insecure about it (which is a clear sign that they're not emotionally mature enough for a relationship anyway).
4. Single People Are Unhappy Because They're Single
Single individuals can be as content, healthy, and prosperous as their coupled peers, and sometimes even more so. In fact, research indicates that single, childfree women rank among the happiest groups out there.
Long-term happiness in marriage is contingent on a healthy, lasting partnership, with studies showing that many marriages don't significantly enhance overall well-being, especially for women. Forcing yourself into a marriage that you're not happy with or ready for can both increase psychological distress and reduce life satisfaction. This is especially true when emotional and domestic tasks are handled unequally, with most of the burden being placed on the wife.
They're Doing Fine
Modern trends are showing a shift here. More people, particularly financially independent women, are prioritizing fulfilling relationships over traditional societal expectations, meaning they're willing to wait for the right person rather than get married young because they feel like they should. Marrying for survival is no longer the norm, and instead, individuals seek compatible partners who share the emotional labor and joint responsibilities.
Even if this wasn't all the case, it's important to remember that some people just don't want to get married or have children, and that's okay! They don't need scientific research to back them up. It's their life, we have no say or sway in what should make them feel fulfilled.
5. Single People Hate Being Single, You Should Be Helping Them Find A Partner
Respect your single friends' choices and refrain from pitying them, okay? Also, don't try to set them up with anyone if you haven't talked to them about it first, especially if your own relationship is toxic.
For those who are single and facing this behavior from peers, remember that genuine, content friends won't shame or excessively focus on your single status. Friends who belittle you might be seeking company for their misery or dissatisfaction in their own relationship, their judgments aren't a reflection of your worth.
Sit And Chat
Remember, a relationship isn't an accomplishment. No one is better for being in a relationship, nor are single people worse for being single. Many singles thrive and find fulfillment within themselves, within hobbies, work, or any other area of life that isn't romance. Enjoying singlehood or not is a personal choice, not a societal obligation.
The next time you think your single friend "really should get back out there," stop to think if that's what they want. If you're concerned, talk to them. They'd much prefer you chat it out over going behind their back to set them up.
The Final Goal
Being single isn't the miserable experience that media and society at large want us to believe it is. There's so much happiness to be found in a single life! There are things to do beyond dating, and there are other people to grow close to. Love exists in so many forms beyond romance.
In the end, whether someone chooses to pursue relationships later in life, take long breaks between partners, or genuinely stay single forever, the only thing that should matter is that they're happy.
That being said, there's also nothing wrong with being concerned about romance. If you've been wanting love but keep running into the same issues time after time, there are tools that can help you break free of this cycle.