5 Personal Secrets You Should Never Reveal
It isn't always in your best interest to share every fact and aspect of yourself.
The information isn't usually necessary and can lead to misconceptions.
Talking about yourself excessively is a great way to push others away and create a monstrous ego.
We've gathered some topics that if you feel the need to bring up in conversation, take a moment to rethink your reasoning.
The Particulars Of Your Life Style
Most people are trying to better themselves and their quality of life. While it's great that you finally kept that weight off or got that promotion, you shouldn't be bragging or showing off.
While you should share parts of your life with those you care about, if most of your gratification comes from the praise of others, you are no longer living life for yourself.
Everyone's family has issues, and those involved don't benefit from outsiders knowing the intimate facts. These are normally very personal problems for everyone involved.
Just because you feel comfortable telling your side, your family members may be incredibly embarrassed or ashamed. More negativity doesn't help the situation. Let confidential information stay that way.
If things are dangerous or unmanageable, there is a difference between getting help and counterproductive sharing. Telling your therapist or friend what's going on in order to gain perspective and vent is appropriate.
Calling the police in violent situations is appropriate. Distributing information for the sake of slander is not appropriate.
If you have an experience or mindfulness practice that has brought you a sense of enlightenment, there are better ways to share that perspective and feelings than simply stating your state.
The same goes for education and wisdom, providing unsolicited examples of your brilliance is a great way to achieve the opposite effect. If someone wants to know your qualifications, they will specifically ask. In the meantime you're just driving people away.
The Good Deeds You Committed
Waxing on about what a decent person you try to be, destroys any sense of selflessness that was present in your actions. It's also disrespectful to others, as you are saying you are better than them.
You are supposed to be a good person. You don't expect praise for not drinking poison, because it's obvious. The same can said for being a decent person.
In your attempt to make people think more highly of you, you may end up planting seeds of doubt that wouldn't have been there otherwise. Why are you trying to make people think you're a good Samaritan? What are you hiding?
Your Deepest Ambitions
When we talk about future goals, our brains perceive this action of speech as a productive achievement towards our goal.
It doesn't matter if you are explaining the premise to a friend, your brain feels it's done serious work and loses motivation.
There is a large amount of research from as far back as 1933, backing this delusion up. Excessive conversation about a goal gives the intent holder a premature sense of completeness.