3 Ways To Practice Non-Attachment In Our Relationships
We're taught from the day we're born that we need to be attached to everything. We need to be attached to the people around us, to the things we have, and even sometimes to present situations. Most importantly, and most painfully, we're taught to be attached to the people we are in love with.
But attachment isn't love. It's a manifestation of objectifying another human being. It's taking possession of them, and it's not a terribly good way to enter into a romance with someone. So what are 3 healthy ways to practice non-attachment?
1. Practice interconnectivity instead of codependency.
When you invest yourself in your partner mentally, spiritually, and emotionally, it creates between the two of you a healthy interdependence. This interdependence fosters feelings of love, self love, support, and interconnectivity. It is, however, important not to give too much and to respect the boundaries of your partner, otherwise the dynamic can be like a runaway train. The end of the tracks? Anger, resentment, and regret.
2. Reject the fear of loss entirely.
If you were to ask most people in a relationship what their greatest fear is, it's losing their partner. You can lose your partner in many different ways, but that fear of loss is an unrealistic idea that roots itself in attachment and possession of people. Instead, completely reject the fear of some future loss and enjoy the moments you have together today.
3. Connect with the source - you.
Here's the ultimate truth about happiness: it's not connected to your girlfriend or your husband. It's not connected to your family or friends. It's not connected to all the stuff in your house or all the dollars in your savings account. It's connected to you. We act like we rely on everything else for bringing us joy, but we bring joy to ourselves. In order to be happy, you must be happy on your own. When you place the expectation of happiness on your partner, you're practicing dependency on them.