Soul icon Otis Redding once sang that, “you don’t miss your water until your well runs dry.”
The “water” in the R&B singer’s reference was the love of a good woman, and to this date, truer words have never been spoken.
You see, while some media may have given you the impression that a woman is willing to offer you an infinite number of chances to get your act together and devote yourself to a real relationship, the truth of the matter is that, once she decides to hit the road, you can kiss the thought of being with her again goodbye, and for good reason.
This isn’t to say that every relationship will be “one strike and you’re out,” quite the contrary.
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There are plenty of instances you might encounter where a good woman will try to work with you through your failings, to help you conquer those challenges and become better.
The point, however, is that those chances are finite. You’re better off doing things right sooner rather than later, because once the relationship is over, it’s over for good, and you’ll be kicking yourself for not realizing sooner.
Think about it this way — who would want to stick around if all you’re doing is causing confusion?
Everyone has their shortcomings, but if you’ve been putting strain on your relationships by being emotionally distant, throwing up walls, avoiding communication, and dodging commitments, is it any wonder a woman would say she’s had enough?
It’s not just the “wise” decision either, it’s common sense, as no person deserves to be dragged through an endless rigamarole of relationship nonsense, no matter how strong the love is.
Knowing that you were the impetus for a breakup might be a tough pill to swallow, and it’ll be even tougher once you realize that she’s moved on and is happy leading a life without you.
Thinking about what you could have done differently will sting, but there is some small amount of solace to be had.
This low point will pass. You will realize your mistakes, and you have an opportunity to learn from them. The door for this relationship is closed, but another one may well open down the line.
Next time a good woman enters your life, make sure you’ve got it together first, then do right by her and avoid the foolish mistakes you know will drive her away.
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Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives