Spirituality

These Toxic Parenting Tactics Are Still Viewed As “Normal”, But People Are Finally Criticizing Them

We know that parenting is hard and there is no to always draw the line between what is good parenting and what is bad parenting. Yet within the grey area in between, enough grown adults have learned better than to repeat their parents' tactics. While maybe these tactics were viewed as "normal" because they were simply passed on from generation to generation and everyone else was doing it, the kids have grown up and they are now speaking out against them.

While the goal is not to criticizing their parents, here is why certain normalized tactics can actually turn out to have real toxic effects as shared by those grown kids on Reddit.

Venting To A Child

little girl doing dishes with her dad with water running

CDC / Unsplash

"Telling your kids your personal problems. Like, 'Your dad is horrible; he didn't even do the dishes. I hate my marriage.' Your kids are not your therapist. Also, they can't do anything to solve your problem. Instead, address your issues with your spouse and a therapist." Desiger_jpg

Kids absorb everything you tell them like a sponge. If you constantly complain about something, they might interpret it as "bad." They could start acting out against their dad, or be unreasonably afraid of certain situations because they don't want to disappoint you or replicate your feelings.

Preventing Their Failure

little girl chases bubbles in the park

Leo Rivas / Unsplash

"Being overly protective. If you don't let your kids fail or protect them too much, they'll be less capable of doing so once they've left home. Failure is good; just provide a safety net." - MyrddinWyllt

Experience is the greatest teacher. No amount of pep talks will ever truly prepare a child to face the world. They need to see it for themselves and carve their own path. If parents protect their children from everything, they'll just be lost as adults and be shocked by the hardships of the world.

Giving Love Conditions

mom hugs little boy by carrying him

Xavier Mouton Photographie / Unsplash

"The old 'as long as I'm feeding you, clothing you, you'll do what I say!' Or the 'just be grateful I put a roof over your head. Especially If your parents constantly use that sentence to boss you around, disregard your opinions and wants, and belittle you. You didn't ask to be born. And it's their obligation to take care of you, not something they should loom over your head as leverage." - izzypy71c

Such statements can make a child feel like love has to be earned and isn't just deserved. These children might grow up to end up bending over backward for people who don't deserve it, and take advantage of it, just because they think that that's the only way they'll ever be loved.

For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert, Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.

Taking Away Privacy

teen woman  with red hair drinks out of mug as she writes in journal

Good Faces / Unsplash

"Violating their privacy will almost certainly do more harm than good to their mental health, trust, and their relationship to you. It doesn't matter if it's installing spyware on their phones, tracking their movements, or taking away their bedroom door." - SinkTube

Kids need to be given the space to build their independence. They need to learn that they deserve to be treated as their own individuals, trusted to make decisions, and loved enough to make their own space in a world where they're going to always be watched by everyone else.

Denying Kids Their Feelings

little boy crying while sitting by the window

Marcos Paulo Prado / Unsplash

"Invalidating their kids' emotions, be it ignoring or shutting them down." - GABBA_GH0UL

Just because they can't put their feelings into words, as they haven't had enough experience to know how to and cry up a storm instead, doesn't mean that their feelings aren't real and valid. Rather than simply attempt to make the crying stop, and punish them for it, parents should take the time to understand the cause. Then they can actually reassure their child and calmly teach them that it may not warrant the level at which they're upset.

Comparing Siblings

" The good old, 'Why can't you be more like your brother/sister?' does nothing for their self-esteem and really can keep them from becoming their own person. That's all they should be anyway — themselves, not their siblings."

Not only does this teach the kid to assess their worth by comparing to others for the rest of their lives, and still never feeling like they're enough, but it also risks creating a sense of rivalry between the siblings instead of uniting them as a family.

Do You Struggle To Love And Be Loved?

woman sits on the floor leaning by the window looking sad

Anthony Tran / Unsplash

​There is no denying that the way you were taught love by your parents during your childhood, will impact the way that you try to find love as an adult. Yet, you don't have to let your parents' mistakes, when they used the wrong tactics even with good intentions, now dictate the mistakes you make when you try to find a loving partner. Click here to find out how to break the cycle.

For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert, Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.

Spirituality

"Aliens" Might Be Considered An Offensive Term To Extra-Terrestrials, According To Pop Star

The pop star is known as Demi Lovato, a 29-year-old musician, actor, and now UFO advocate. The star has made headlines before and is not afraid to stand their ground for what they believe in. Lovato inspired many when they identified as nongender binary in 2021 and changed their pronouns from she/her to they/them.

Since then, Demi has been on a quest to unravel the truth about ufos, and making mind-blowing realizations. This is all part of their own spiritual journey towards open-mindedness and acceptance.

Lovato Believes ETs Mean No Harm

Demi Lovato Press pose in purple blazer

Emma McIntyre / Getty

Demi Lovato is currently promoting a new documentary named Identified, during which they go on a journey to investigate the truth about UFO sightings.

They believe that making contact can be a peaceful experience if we let it be one. In an interview with PEDESTRIAN.tv, they explained: "I really think that if there was anything out there that would want to do that to us, it would have happened by now." If we want to keep our relationship in good standing, we might need to consider how we refer to them.

But Calling Anyone "Aliens" Could Be Offensive

costume visual of alien with bug eyes

Brian Mcmahon/ Unsplash

Lovato finds that referring to extraterrestrials as "aliens" is derogatory. They explain: "I think that we have to stop calling them aliens because aliens is a derogatory term for anything. That's why I like to call them E.T.s!"

The desire to eliminate the word "alien" when referring to otherworldly visitors might have something to do with the negative connotation it has taken historically. The word "alien" is used to refer to immigrants or people who came from other countries. This term separated them from everyone else and made them feel dehumanized.

It's An Effort To Make The World A Better Place

ET silhouette stands in sunrise sky

Stephen Leonardi / Unsplash

Lovato doesn't mean to sound controversial and told the publication that their upcoming documentary is just to give "an understanding of how much we need to take care of our planet and how much we need to learn how to expand our consciousness."

They hope that the world is ready for acceptance, even of what if we can't necessarily understand it all. Lovato holds on to this hope when they say "I think that the world is becoming a more open place, slowly, but surely, I think that we're making progress. And we're slowly getting there. But, you know, any progress is progress!"

Are You Still Looking For Your Life's Purpose?

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Din Reichmuth

You won't believe what the science of Numerology can reveal about you!

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The 6 Signs Of An Intuition That Is Always On Point, And Should Be Listened To

The good news is that we all have intuition. Every single one of us. The bad news is, we don't all know how to tap into it. For some of us, our experience and natural abilities give us a much more powerful sense of intuition. Empaths for example are known to have an intuition that can almost feel supernatural in its strength.

So how do you know which category you fall into? Well, if you meet the following signs, then chances are your intuition is one that should always be trusted, and listened to.

Noticing 11:11 On The Clock

clock that shows 11:30 timing

Jessica Monte / Pexels

Your intuition will literally try to communicate with you. In order to get your attention, it will shift your focus to patterns such as numbers. Pay attention to them and look up what they mean. Each set of digits can reveal a lot of information on what message you are being sent.

Pay attention to other patterns and opportunities. For example, if you're struggling at work, your intuition might direct you to job postings that directly align with your interests. ​

You Feel A Peaceful Feeling Physically In Your Chest

close up of woman's hands resting on her chest

Giulia bertelli / Unsplash

When your intuition is really strong, it can start to take a toll on you physically. Some people say that they know its their gut talking when they feel a peaceful feeling in their heart. Yet, others say they feel a sinking feeling instead.

Some people even say that they feel in their intuition in the form of chest or stomach pain, kind of like their stomach is in knots. Often this can also reveal whether your intuition is warning you against something bad or simply redirecting you towards something great.

Your Dreams Are Vivid

Blurry shadow clone of a woman on blue scribbled words

Jr Korpa / Unsplash

Pay attention to your dreams as they often hold messages communicated to you from beyond, or from deep in within your subconscious. Dreams can be decoded. Falling dreams for example are a way for your body to get you to pay attention to your surroundings to prevent you from making a mistake.

Spirits will also use dreams to communicate with you as the veil between our worlds is much thinner in the middle of the night and while you're sleeping.The interesting part about intuition is that it is not linear or stuck in time, what your intuition picks up can say a lot about your past, present, and future.

You Keep Getting Sick

woman hugging he stomach while kneeling forward

Danie Franco / Unsplash

Be careful of dismissing your intuition. It may be difficult to take the risks it's pointing you to and step out of your comfort zones, but the more you push those intuitive feelings aside, the more they're bound to come out another way. Often you'll find yourself feeling stressed and physically sick.

These anxiety-like symptoms are your body's way of warning you that something feels off and that you need to listen to it and change.

Your Empathetic Abilities Are Off The Charts

woman wraps her arm around man as they sit by the water in the sun reflection

Cathy Mu / Unsplash

The more intune you are with your intuition, the more likely you are to be aligned with the universe and those around you. This will give you an ability to not only be empathic to others but to literally be able to pick up on their energy.

Your intuition will guide you in noticing when their energy is off and assess if those around you have the right kind of energy. This ability will intuitively instruct you in who to trust and who is a part of your calling.

You Know About Things Before They Happen

Blurry woman with her shadow clone looking at the camera by the water

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Yes, your intuition can give you a psychic-like ability. You may not be able to predict exactly what someone is going to say but you likely are able to have "a feeling" of what it will entail. You may be able to "feel" that certain situations will lead to problems or that a specific course of action is the "right" thing to do without being able to exactly explain why.

This is thanks to your experience and your natural understanding of people. Trust that acting on it will be of benefit.

You Experience One Too Many Coincidences

woman sitting on bleachers stairs and thinking

Anthony Tran / Unsplash

Coincidences are rarely ever that. They usually are a piece of a puzzle that may be hard to see in the moment. The butterfly effect for example would show that each little move will play out in a series of others moves that all depended on one another. Pay attention to pattern repetitions, odd timing and other "coincidences"

These are likely just synchonisties that are meant to confirm that you're on the right path and that your internal guidance is aligned with the will of the universe.