Relationships
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The Six Stages Of Leaving An Emotionally Manipulative Relationship

"Sometimes you've got to let everything go – purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything . . . whatever is bringing you down, get rid of it. Because you'll find that when you're free, your true creativity, your true self comes out."- Tina Turner

The worst part about emotionally manipulative relationships is that those in them sometimes can't even see how bad it's gotten. The more it happens, the more it's normalized and even justify. The manipulation can completely destroy them from the inside out, making them unable to see beyond it and completely codependent on their manipulator.

But there is hope. Everyone eventually reaches a point where they feel like they can't take it anymore. According to the stages of change, this is how people move through a process of defined stages. It has to start from a place of readiness to be able to handle the significant life changes it will bring. Each step brings them closer to freedom once again. Here are the five main stages.

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The Preawareness Stage

woman holds her hand up to the camera

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It's not surprising that those deep in manipulative relationships are blind to the red flags because they've been manipulated to do so. Their partners will use blame-shifting, criticism, aggression, anger, or even pity to trap them into feeling vulnerable, codependent and justify their behavior.

It's usually friends or family who will first notice the signs and start bringing them up. Often, the victim will deny them for a while or at least minimize them but eventually comes to see them too. Even then, it can take a long time to make the shift from awareness to a willingness to actually want to do something about it.

The Contemplation Stage

woman looks in the mirror while crying

Kevin Laminto / Unsplash

This stage is crucial as it is during this stage that those who have suffered manipulation start to rewire their thoughts from the ones brainwashed into them to their own beliefs. They gradually start to take in the severity of the issue without minimizing, justifying, or denying it.

They may even start confronting their partner about it. During this stage, they are often still hopeful things will get better or be fixed, while also accepting the possibility that they may have to walk away. This stage can be quite conflicting as they struggle to make a decision on what to do next.

The Preparation Stage

woman puts her face and hand against a window

Danny G / Unsplash

​This stage is where the victim realizes that the relationship is beyond repair and that their manipulator isn't willing to make a change. The frustration fuels them to finally be committed to taking action.

This point is key in making sure there is a stable transition to a breakup. Preparing for it requires having an exit strategy, an escape plan if necessary, a safety plan if needed, and a consideration of the risks of each action. At that stage, those going through it need a lot of support, resources, and validation.

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The Action Stage

woman looking through open blinds

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​This stage puts the preparation plan into action. It's a stage full of fear and uncertainties as the survivor, who is no longer a victim, adapts to the change that their new life brings.

This stage is not linear but it is sudden. It can feel like everything is changing all at once. New routines are built. Some require a new home, new friends, a new network, or even a new job depending on how intertwined their lives were with their manipulator.

The Resistance Stage

man texting by the window

Thom Holmes / Unsplash

At this stage, it can be quite tempting to want to take it all back and go back to what's comfortable. The manipular may be starting to realize what they're losing and go to extreme lengths to try and win their partner back.

It's important not to cave to loneliness and their emotional tactics in this danger zone. Resiting impulses and advantages is key in getting through this almost final stage.

The Moving On Stage

close up of woman with brow eyes looking forward

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​This is the stage where the relationship is officially terminated. Once you pass through the temptation, you transition into grief. It's okay to mourn even the worst of relationships.

Eventually, even grief passes and is replaced with freedom and excitement for a new beginning. Confidence is rebuilt and a new life is built despite all of its ucertainties.

You Deserve Love

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We don't blame you for being frustrated with dating and wanting to stick with what's comfortable but if you're struggling to find and keep a quality relationship click here to find out how to break the cycle.

For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert, Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.

Uplifting

Homeless Man Found Long-Lost Sister After 20 Years, But That Wasn't Even The Miracle

You know what the best part of hardships is? It's the light at the end of the tunnel. No matter how dim, or even nonexistent it may seem for a while, it's always there, waiting for you at your destination.

Logan's story didn't see the light for a whole 20 years, which for the young man was a whole lifetime. Yet, he didn't let life's hardest tests get him down and he always held on to the hope of finding that light, till one day he did. He thought reuniting with his lost sister would be the light he was looking for this whole time. Except his sister was already living with her own family at that point...

To find the light at the end of your tunnel, you need to understand your purpose and your potential so that you can take control of your emotions, your life, and your future. Take a quick zodiac reading here to find out what your universe has to say about you right now.

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Life Was Hard From The Very Beginning

Hunt as a young kid smiling while sitting in dining room chair

USA Today / Youtube

Logan's hardships started from the day he was born. For whatever reason, his parents didn't feel fit to raise him, so he was put up for adoption when he was just a toddler. Not all kids get lucky and get adopted when they get put in the system.

Unfortunately for Logan, no family wanted to keep him and he was sent from one foster home to the next until he reached the age of 18. Considered an adult, he aged out of the system and had no choice but to become homeless. All he had ever wanted was a family but instead, he grew up his whole life feeling alone.

A Social Worker Who Cared

files drawer with hundred of files from vabinet

Maksym Kaharlytskyi / Unsplash

Fortunately, all it takes to make a difference in someone's life is finding one person who cares. For Logan, it was his social worker. Once his 11 years in the foster care system were up, Logan's caseworker was determined to find him a good place to live. So far, all his living arrangements had been temporary, and he had never had a place to call home. For a time, Logan even lived in his car.

Looking carefully through his files, they discovered that Logan actually had a biological sister named Shyann who was already living with a good family. The caseworker hoped and prayed that the family would also take an interest in Logan, so she called up Shyan's adoptive mother.

Logan Was Deemed To Be "Toxic"

Logan and his sister hug when reunited

USA Today / Youtube

The caseworker was hoping Robert and Ara Hunt, Shyanna's parents would welcome Logan but that wasn't the case. The family already had 3 adopted children and they were afraid that Logan would disrupt the dynamic that they had created for their family.

Logan's sister was 12 years old at the time and the family was afraid that her biological homeless brother, who was living in a car, would be toxic to their family. In an interview, tey explained: : “We wanted nothing to do with him. We didn’t know anything about him. We were afraid.”

A Television Segment That Reflected The Truth

Logan sitting in interview chair

USA Today / Youtube

You wouldn't think that television is where you'd find the truth and have your whole perspective changed but that was the case for Logan.

The Hunt family saw a local television segment about Logan's journey out of foster cre and it completely changed their mind on the young man. That piece changed the father Robert Hunt’s mind about the 18-year-old. The father said in an interview: “I was just knocked down. I think I’m a pretty good judge of character, and I saw the good character in him."

If you're looking for a sign on whether you need a change then you're here for a reason This is your sign. Take a quick zodiac reading here to find out how you can take control of your career path

From Tragedy To Blessings

car crashed from he side with the plate hanging off

Michael Jin / Unsplash

Up until then, Logan had known nothing but rejection. He told USA Today how the constant rejection that his life made him feel “empty” and “alone," and he felt as though he had “nothing to look forward to.”

Right when Logan thought his life couldn't get worse, he got into a car accident. Yet, he had no idea that this tragedy would turn into a blessing too. Ara went to go visit him in the hospital, and she ended up bringing him home with her. He had no idea another miracle would be waiting for him at her home.

Happily More After

People Magazine

Logan went back to meet his sister and her newfound family thinking the reunion itself would be his miracle while he recovered from the accident. He believed his stay with the family would be temporary just like all his past ones.

As he bonded with the family, Logan fit right in. It didn't take long before the Hunt family performed a second miracle and decided to start the process of adopting Logan! It was finally Logan's chance to reach the light of the end of the tunnel and become part of a family just like he always wanted.

New Beginnings

Logan's life at almost 20 years old was just starting. After 13 years of temporary living arrangements, he finally found his forever home. It turns out that hope and patience were all he needed and the universe had a plan for him all along.

These kinds of stories can happen to anyone. You might think you're never going to catch a break, but there's a light waiting for you too. Are you still searching for your life purpose? You won't believe what the science of Numerology can reveal about you

The numerology of your birth date, regardless of what month you were born, can reveal surprising information about your personality and that's. a good place to start.

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