There Are Two Ways Human Beings Live, Which One Do You Fall Under?

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It is no secret that we all share one common desire in life and that is to be happy. But how we come to find that happiness divides us into two categories. These categories aren’t necessarily based on what desires we’ve associated with happiness but our interpretation of the experience of life altogether. We have conditioned ourselves to live in one of two ways, but only one of these ways is actually beneficial in helping us reach happiness.

We may not even realize we’ve placed ourselves in one of these two categories. Find out based on the characteristics which category you belong in currently, and whether it truly does bring you happiness.

We All Just Want To Be Happy

man stands in scenic area witharms open

Kal Visuals / Unsplash

Kal Visuals / Unsplash

All of humanity shares one common goal and that is to be happy. Some think that happiness if found in power, because they’ve convinced themselves that if they’re at the top, they’re no longer vulnerable to having happiness taken away. Others find happiness in material things, because they can always be made available. The average person finds little doses of happiness in their career, their relationships, and in their travels.

But what does it actually mean to be happy? Author Roy T. Bennett wrote in his book that “If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.” This would indicate that maybe happiness is an ongoing process, not a destination that can be reached and kept safe in a lockbox.

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No Point Being On Time

We tend to live life while always working for the next thing. The moment rarely feels like it’s good enough and instead is used as a stepping stone for something we’re not even sure of yet. We’re happy in our relationships but we’re waiting for the next milestone or we’re happy in our job but waiting for a promotion. So really, we’re never actually living in the moment.

Rather, we keep going back to the past and trying to either learn from it or get caught in its regrets. Then when we let go of the past, we’re then preoccupied with “what’s next” and already working in the future. To be in the present moment is to be neither in the past nor the future. In fact, it means completely letting go of the concept of time altogether because even if you’re on time, you’re already in the next moment. To truly live in the present moment, is to not be defined by the time but in a state of flow that is neither tied to the last moment nor the next moment, but just the now.

It Comes Down To The Experiences Of The Mind

Solstock / Getty Images Signature Via Canva Pro

Solstock / Getty Images Signature Via Canva Pro

We can’t really blame ourselves for the way our minds and definitions of happiness work. It all goes back to our childhood and the sum of all the moments that have brought us to the present one. As children, we had a blank slate, and happiness was possible in every way. But as time went on we learned that actions had consequences and the more bad experiences we had, the more we took measures to avoid being in situations that caused us pain.

We retained memories of how certain situations made us feel. While we craved more of the happy ones, we protected ourselves more and more of the bad ones, simultaneously lowering the possibility of experiencing more of the good ones. There is a difference between maximizing safety and contentment to minimize pain, and actually maximizing happiness through risks that could increase pain. The reason some people are happier than others depends on their ability to open themselves up to all experiences and feelings

Option 1: To Feel Fully

woman wrapped in blanket smiling in sunlight

Dale De Vera / Unsplash

Dale De Vera / Unsplash

Now that you have a better understanding of why some people can be happier than others, it’s time to figure out which of two lifestyles you’ve conditioned yourself into. Ideally, you want to be in this category. People who live to feel fully, experience as much pain as they do happiness because they open themselves up to all experiences and risks.

The moment of pure genuine happiness they do get to experience is so overwhelming and life-changing that it makes all painful moments worth it in the process plus in a way, it gives them the tools to deal with those moments. To allow yourself to feel fully whatever happens, is to be able to live life to the fullest and enjoy its most rewarding gifts, even if it sometimes comes at a cost. These kinds of people don’t overthink, they just flow. They take risks and enjoy spontaneity.

Option 2: To Filter Through The Mind

woman leaning against window and looking utwise

Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas / Pexels

Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas / Pexels

Then, the other way of life involves filtering through the mind. People here have a harder time embracing what is happening right now, and often dissociate from painful events or deny themselves their own feelings. In an attempt to protect and shelter themselves they miss out on big opportunities. It’s true that this allows them to feel less pain in general. But it’s only when we’re able to embrace and allow ourselves to feel pain, that we release ourselves from it altogether and can move on to bigger and better things.

However, it’s not easy to not take the time to think of the consequences of our actions when our mind has learned that pain could be just around the corner. These kinds of people are rational and rely on logic to make their decisions. They prefer to feel stable in comfortable routines as to be able to somewhat predict the future and feel in control over their lives.

Take Off The Filter

handing holding pink lens filter

Stephen Kraakmo / Unsplash

Stephen Kraakmo / Unsplash

Our bodies and minds are wired to protect us from danger. A lot of our anxiety is actually just the body’s way of preparing to defend us against any possible threat. When we shut down, it’s because we go into a flight response, and when we get angry and feel out of control it’ ‘s because we’re going into a fight response. Both of these responses are biologically designed to help us eliminate any possible pain and reduce consequences. So how come, we’re working against ourselves and our own happiness?

What happens is that once we experience deep pain, our mind tries to make sure that we never have to go through it again. Our definition of happiness becomes less about finding it and more about not losing the bit of it that we have found so far. The more bad experiences we have, the more we start to filter. But when we start to filter too much, our whole reality becomes distorted. We develop a negative filter that expects the worse and is tainted by negativity. We live in fear instead of embracing opportunities.

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Protection That Prevents Healing

hands opening up to receive

Milanda Vigerova / Unsplash

Milanda Vigerova / Unsplash

Ironically the very system that is intended to protect us and help us survive can be the one that destroys our happiness and prevents our healing. But, that’s only if we let it. By reading this article, you have already taken a step forward towards happiness because you’ve put yourself in a state of awareness. Now, instead of jumping to protect yourself the next time you perceive risk, you’ll think about it more.

The more you remove the filter, the more reality you’ll be able to take on along with information that you might have missed. You’ll find new truths and develop a positive perception where happiness is actually possible again. You just have to create it. Ironically the more you filter, the more you’ll experience pain and limit your happiness. But, the more you feel and experience, the more happiness you let in.

The Original Key To Happiness: To Feel Whatever Happens

close up of woman's smile

Lesly Juarez / Unsplash

Lesly Juarez / Unsplash

So what really is the key to happiness? It’s to live life the way it was always intended and to feel whatever happens. Put yourself in a state of being that is open and receptive. Stop trying to actively escape pain as the more you do that, the more you’ll stray from your path and increase levels of anxiety that mess with your vibrations and alignment.

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Higher Perspectives Author

Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives