6 Ways To Be Thankful To Those Who Hurt Us So We Can Transcend Our Suffering

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Don’t Judge Yourself For Being Hurt

man standing as a silhouette in the shadows of a field

Kilarov Zaneit / Unsplash

Kilarov Zaneit / Unsplash

To transcend suffering, you need to not judge yourself for your feelings or emotions. Instead, be present in the moment and accept your hurt.

Remember that you cannot control the actions of those who hurt you but you’re in complete control of how you react to them. The key is in finding the factors that allowed for this situation to happen, and to recognize them so that you can prevent them from affecting you once more.

Take The Opportunity To Remember Who You Are

women's reflection in the mirror with her eyes closed and surrounded by petals

Lucas Souza / Pexels

Lucas Souza / Pexels

There was a version of you that once thrived before ever meeting the one who hurt you. That person may have evolved and been impacted by the memories made but they are still there. All it takes is one good look in the mirror. Try connecting back to your roots and the activities that make your heart sing.

The good news is that not only can you make your way back to your old self, but you can now use the lessons from the experience of being hurt to grow and become an even better version of the person you were then.

It Has Nothing To Do With You

man laying in dirt on a bed of flowers

​The hurt is not who you are. When someone hurts you, it usually comes down to their own darkness. They may be fighting shadows they never told you about or were even aware of themselves. They may be haunted by their past experiences and projected their hurt unto you.

Know that although you have unwillingly played a part in their journey, you may also now be a part of the process of their healing. Let it be completely. Be the space for it. Welcome the hurt it brought you willingly,. This will free you through acceptance and accelerate how fast the suffering will leave you.

Cherish The Memories

box full of old pictures



Think of the hobbies they interested you, the people they’ve introduced you to, or even the places they’ve shown you. These are the things they can never take from you again.

Not only does reminiscing on the memories enlighten you on the lessons you have learned, but they will give you a new sense of appreciation for the person who has hurt you, so that you are able to find forgiveness and move forward.

Know That You Are Being Woken Up

woman sitting up in bed in sun's reflection

Ron Lach / Pexels

Ron Lach / Pexels

This may seem like irony, but you can’t recognize true happiness without gratitude and you can’t experience gratitude without being able to compare it to feelings of pain.

Be grateful for your suffering. Be grateful for the one who hurt you. It is waking you up. It is allowing you to look deeper into yourself to increase the connection between your mind and body. Identify with it and let it in.

You Are Now Even Closer To Where You Are Meant To Be

woman walking on a rainy path with polka dotted bag

Lisa / Pexels

Lisa / Pexels

Every person you encounter will leave their mark. They will come in and out of your life for a reason. If you let them in each time, even at the risk of being vulnerable, you allow yourself to receive all the lessons they have to teach you.

With each lesson, you are pushed further onto your path. You may be redirected a few times along the way, but this will make the destination feel all the more worth it when you make it there.

Higher Perspectives Author

Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives