Featured Jun. 01, 2015 03:56AM EST
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We're Not Born With It
We weren't born confident. Confidence is a quality we need to cultivate by thinking outside of the box and refusing to live only to please others. Think back to when you were a child. You didn't need to be confident then, you simply cried when things didn't go your way. But, as you grew up, you start to notice the impact of how others see you and you become self-conscious. We're the ones that give power to others by letting what they think to dictate our confidence when really it's how we feel about ourselves that will radiate confidence.
That's why all it takes to be more confident is five minutes designed to rewire your thought pattern to bring the attention back where it belongs.
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Strike A Power Pose
Elisabeth Wales / Unsplash
Guess what? No one is confident all the time. Not even those who have a full makeup and hair team every single day. The key is knowing how to switch confidence back on when it seems fleeting. You can actually trick your own brain.
Go into a room where you can be alone. It helps if there's a mirror. Then extend your arms up in a "V" shape. Stand as tall and as big as you possibly can. This is called the Victory stance and is a power pose. Keep your feet shoulder-width apart ad your chin up, and stand there in silence for two whole minutes. It might feel awkward for the first 30 seconds, but it'll fix your posture, bring a smile to your face and restore your confidence. Take that power out the door with you by keeping your head held high and your body standing straight.
Maintain Eye Contact
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Eye Contact is arguably the most powerful form of communication. When interacting with others, looking them in the eye makes them feel seen and acknowledges every word they say. When you keep your gaze fixated on them, after a while you genuinely stop noticing everything happening around them, and in a way you make them feel like the only person in the world.
You can do the same thing to yourself. Stand by a mirror and stare straight into your own and watch the world melt away. Remind yourself with the intention that at this moment all that matters is you. Everything else is on hold because to face it, you need to first check-in with yourself. You have all the power to make that happen because you love yourself, you have a purpose, and you matter. Remember who you are and ground yourself.
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Lose The "Ums"
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A confident person articulates and speaks with intention. Instead of blurting out whatever comes to mind, show assertiveness by taking a second to think before you speak. Not only will this help you lose the ums and uhs but it will make what you say seem more valuable. the same goes for awkward giggles at the end of a sentence.
Laughing when you're done is like saying that everything you just said was a joke and completely discredits you. You can practice this even as you think. Train your thought patterns so they flow.
Relive Your Most Glorious Moment
David Hofmann / Unsplash
This step is most beneficial at the moment right before you're about to be in the spotlight. Close your eyes. Think of the last time that you were proud of yourself in a situation. Remember how you felt, what you said, and why you did it.
Remember how successful you were and how capable you are of creating such success. Imagine all the details of that last moment of success and take the confidence it brings you into your next glorious moment.
Recreate Your Environment
Jan Huber / Unplash
Do you know why some people who spend their days in offices aren't happy no matter how much money they make? It's because of their environment, constantly being in front of a screen and between four walls. Some research shows that taking even just two minutes to walk in greenery can completely change your mood. Remember that happiness is confidence so you want to be stimulating your brain and its perception of the world in every way that you can.
Whenever you're running low on confidence go and connect with nature, or experience a new place, or just change your environment to somewhere that makes you feel good and watch how it changes your mood. This then will reflect in how you present yourself to others.
Reframe Your Breath
Darius Bashar / Unsplash
When you're anxious and experiencing low self-esteem, your breathing physically changes. You start breathing heavily, and faster. The more shallow your breathing becomes, the worst you feel.
Instead, try breathing deeply with intention. Stand up and breathe in for five seconds, completely filling your diaphragm, and then breath out for another five seconds. As you take control of your breath, start visualizing a future where you are in control. Tell yourself "I breath in peace and I breath out anxiety" If you do this for a couple of minutes, you should feel relaxed and in control afterward.
Stop Chasing Someone Else's Ideal
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