What Should I Do To Finally Find Peace? An Honest Confession
This is the story of an anonymous woman who is struggling. She hopes to find help within her community, and find the path to peace from their accumulated knowledge and experience.
Take a moment to read about the events that led her to this moment and let us know your thoughts on what she should do next.
“I Grew Up In A Boken Home”
“My parents were in a toxic relationship that lasted way too long even though at the time all I wanted was for them to stay together. My childhood memories are filled with yelling and fights.
Often, my parents were distant or aggressive with me. I now realize it was their projection of the sadness and hurt they caused each other.”
“I Used My Relationship To Fill A Void”
“It may seem ironic, but my learned behavior from my parents caused me to repeat the same patterns. I longed to be loved so badly to make up for the lack of it in my childhood home that I settled for the wrong person.
Yet I am afraid to leave them and be completely on my own. I know that they love me in their own way. Even if it’s not always healthy, sometimes that still feels like enough.”
“I Overwork Myself So I Don’t Have To Think”
“Somewehere along the line of my adult life, I became a workaholic. I considered myself driven and ambitious at first but now I’m losing sense of my priorities. I never have time to cook or exercise anymore, let alone spend time meditating.
I considered quitting but the idea makes me feel like a failure. I’ve worked hard to get to the point that I’m at and I’m scared of losing it all and having to start back from scratch.”
“I Wish Money Was The Answer”
“I keep telling myself I’ll be happier if I make more money. Yet, money keeps coming and my happiness doesn’t follow. I wonder if it’s because I haven’t made enough to reach my goal yet or if I’ll ever find joy in being rich.
Having money feels comforting because even if I end up alone, at least I’ll have the means to live an abundant life. How much money is enough money?”
“I Never Have Time For My Loved Ones”
“I have accidentally burned bridges with people I once held dearly. My friends complain that I never make the time for them or provide support when they need it. It’s not that I don’t want to give it to them. I just don’t know how to make that time.
My family comes in last on my priority list because I assume that they must love me unconditionally anyway.”
“Where Do I Start?”
“By now you surely can tell that I am not at peace with myself or my life. I often hear that to reach Nirvana you must first find peace within yourself so that you can reach your highest self.
How do I do that? Where do I start? You are my community and I look forward to hearing your answers.”
Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives