5 Differences Between Toxic and True Love

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There are some clear differences between true love and toxic love, we all know this, but sometimes we have a hard time identifying exactly what those differences are.

Here are 5 specific differences between a true, real love, and a toxic relationship.

1. In true love, self-love and improvement is a top priority

woman screaming and crying holding her head
Juan Monino / Getty Images Signature Via Canva Pro
Juan Monino / Getty Images Signature Via Canva Pro

Your partner should want you to be the best version of yourself and have the best opportunities to achieve self-actualization, and you should want the same for them.

You should want what is best for each other more than anything.

In toxic love, absolutely all of the focus is on the relationship itself and how it defines the both of you.

There is no room for self improvement or introspection because the two of you can’t untangle yourselves from each other.

This is a negative perspective and hinders personal growth in a big way.

Learn how to keep your partner coming back for more, click here and watch this free video from relationship expert, Amy North.

2. In true love, it’s perfectly alright to have separate interests, hobbies and passions

It’s okay to have your own friends that aren’t mutual acquaintances, or to leave and do things separately from time to time.

There is no fear of retribution for spending time apart or doing something outside of the relationship.

In toxic love, no one is allowed to have a life outside of the other.

Everything must be done together, or else jealousy and dejection come into the picture.

This is unhealthy codependency and cannot sustain itself. It will cause resentment and probably damage a lot of friendships.

3. In true love, it isn’t difficult to embrace and love your partner for all of their oddities and flaws

They are unique in good and sometimes not so good ways, but you should have no problem accepting and loving them for all of it.

In toxic love, you or your partner may obsess constantly over changing you into what they believe you should be.

Someone who is easier to love or be with. Someone who will bend to their criticisms and alter themselves for “love”.

4. In true love, intimacy is a deep and poignant bond that has been cultivated and carefully nurtured over time

It grows from true friendship and connection and cannot be feigned. In toxic love, sex is something connoted with fear, shame or worry.

You spend all of your intimate encounters trying to be the perfect fantasy for your partner and not enjoying yourself. You feel pressured and insecure about your body and behavior.

5. In true love, all conversations have a beneficial goal

Even discussions about frustrations should be calm and come from a place of caring and love.

In toxic love, conversations often devolve into arguments or blame contests.

Many conversations that seem positive and loving at first are really just manipulative ploys to get you to do something they want or give them something.

Yelling is an unfortunately common occurrence.

We don’t blame you for being frustrated with dating and wanting to stick with what’s comfortable but if you’re struggling to find and keep a quality relationship click here to find out how to break the cycle.

For more great relationship advice and tips on how to attain the kind of love you deserve, watch this video from expert, Amy North: Click Here To Watch The Full Video.

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Higher Perspectives Author

Higher Perspectives Author is one of the authors writing for Higher Perspectives