There’s a theory that we really only fall in love with three people in our lifetime. We may like a lot of people throughout our lives but these are the ones that mark us, consume us and change us. The only problem is that we often have a hard time letting go so most of us never even make it to the third one despite it being the most important, most successful kind of love.
We need to experience each of one of these loves for a different reason. But we also need to not be limited by them so that we can experience the unlimited love that happens the third time, if we’re patient enough to wait for it. Surely, we can all chose to stay with our first love because it’s comfortable and out of fear of never finding a second, or third. But those loves will always feel like something is missing and here’s why.
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Our First Idealistic Love
We are often young when we experience our first love, some of us are as young as our teens while the more patient sum of us are in our twenties. During this love, we’re still trying to figure out who we are, how we love, and how we want to be loved. We have an uneven balance of needs because we don’t even know yet what they are, let alone how to ask for them.
During this first love, we’re chasing an ideal of love, not one based on our tailored wants, needs, and desires. Our expectation of it is only based on movies and fairytales because we’re missing the experience to be able to create our own standard. Often we go through this love because we feel like we should, not for the right reasons.